so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
areolas are like halos for boobs.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize