Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Randomize
