Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
