True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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