dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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