just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
