Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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