like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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