but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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