Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
