My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
