you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
