beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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