forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
