dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
