Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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