He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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