you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Slut skills are useful in every country.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
