I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
