Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Randomize