I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
is it fun? or sober?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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