Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
