what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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