i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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