did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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