i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
