someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
