i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize