This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Randomize
