You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
