U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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