am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
