So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
