The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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