so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
