just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
