Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize