PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
