Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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