you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
