Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize
