Swine flu is the new snow day.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
