It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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