how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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