If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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