My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
