I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
