So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Randomize
