just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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