If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
