Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Too much gin, very little bucket
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
